11- Who should you invite to lunch?

Now that you know how important it is to eat with co-workers, next question you may ask is “Who do I eat with?” The short answer is – anyone, as long as you are not eating alone and you are taking advantage of the opportunity to learn something new. This is not a new concept, Greek Philosopher Epicurus, who lived from 341–270 BC, said, “We should look for someone to eat and drink with before looking for something to eat and drink…” Although I could make the argument that you will learn something by eating with anyone, you should start your search for a dining partner with co-workers of all levels, colleagues in different departments, and industry contacts.

Eat with co-workers of every experience level

The first year of my career, as a recently hired staff engineer, one of the mistakes I made was only eating lunch with other staff engineers. It isn’t that I didn’t like having conversations with my boss, or people at different experience levels. Rather, I wasn’t sure if it was proper business etiquette for a young engineer to ask the branch manager or a field technician to lunch. By not asking them to join me for a meal, I missed many opportunities to learn from them. Shortly after a year at the company, a field technician asked me to join him for lunch to discuss an instrumentation plan I developed. Over a plate of nachos, I learned that because I hadn’t looked at the most recent site civil plan, one of the instruments I had scheduled for installation was in the middle of a stormwater basin that was full of water. He politely asked if he should get a barge to get the drill rig out to the location. Having learned more about his experiences in the field, I was able to make the instrumentation plan more constructible, and start building a strong foundation that I could rely on when asking advice for future plans.

Similarly, you can learn a lot from people at higher levels than you. For example, if you are a staff level engineer, considering asking a senior staff engineer to lunch to ask them about their experiences writing proposals, giving presentations, or researching a technical topic. By engaging people with more experience, you gain insight into your own career path.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you should exclude the people at your own level. On the contrary, these folks are some of your most important allies as you navigate career obstacles. These colleagues are, or have recently been, in your same shoes and although they likely have a similar technical background, they have had different life experiences and can often add a fresh perspective to the conversation.

Eat with colleagues outside of your department

Over the Thanksgiving holiday, my sister-in-law, who is a teacher, taught me about Planned Learning Communities. In the academic community, this is a place where teachers of all disciplines can get together to discuss how their individual lesson plans can be connected to teach the kids a more holistic picture. For example, while she discusses geography and the importance of the Mississippi River as students read The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the Science teacher explains to them how steamboats work. Do you have a similar work environment with access to all types of industry experts outside of your own department? If so, have you taken advantage of the knowledge in the other departments?

At most companies, the people in each department are trained similarly, and have similar technical backgrounds. However, little effort is spent in cross-training and sharing of ideas between departments. This is a widely missed opportunity to build your knowledge base and collaborate with people who think differently. Whether you are asking someone to lunch to get to know them and their background, or to brainstorm on a difficult problem, inviting someone from a different group to lunch allows you access to another perspective by simply walking down the hall.

Eat with people outside of your company

Eating with industry contacts outside your company is, perhaps, the most neglected source of support and information for young professionals. Just as your co-workers bring their own experience and expertise to the conversation, eating with professionals that work in companies related to your industry can be informative and provide you with a different perspective on many topics.

For example, once a month I have lunch with a woman who works for a construction company. Our conversations range from sharing new project leads to dealing with specific issues such as being a woman in today’s engineering and construction world. Asking someone in a related field to lunch can have several benefits. First, it is an easy way to help you stay abreast of current industry trends. If the person sitting across the table from you at lunch reads different industry newspapers or blogs than you, it is likely that you are sitting in the right spot. Having lunch with someone that follows different trends in the same industry can help you augment your experience database.

Additionally, most of the people-related challenges you will experience in your career are not specific to your industry. Having lunch with someone outside of your company gives you the opportunity to discuss issues that may be taboo within your own company. For example, if your boss micro-manages you and you are looking for advice on how to change the situation, it is probably better if the person you are bouncing ideas off of works for a different company, as they will have an independent and fresh perspective on your situation.

Take advantage of dining with co-workers, at different experience levels and departments, as well as people in your industry to gain valuable insight, solve problems faster, and fast-track your career.

Who are you going to extend an invitation to?

For more information on this topic, check out Never Eat Alone, by Keithe Ferrazzi.